1. ASManager2_6.zip Driver
2. d_dangle.txt File Contents

d_dangle.txt Driver File Contents (ASManager2_6.zip)

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Dangling Modifiers


Modifiers are added to sentences to clarify, to give the reader a clearer picture. Unfortunately, modifiers sometimes do the opposite: 

Last summer I met a woman with a Corvette that was fast.

Hmmmmmmm. Does this sentence leave you with some questions?

Was it the Corvette that was fast?
Was it the woman that was fast?

See if you can resolve the ambiguity by making a simple change in the sentence. After you have written your version, compare it with the two possibilities that follow.



Ambiguous Version:

Last summer I met a woman with a Corvette that was fast.


Your Improved Version:

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Name and save this file now. (Press ctrl+S, type a name for the file, and press enter.)



Your sentence should have been similar to one of the following versions:


Last summer I met a fast woman with a Corvette.

or

Last summer I met a woman with a fast Corvette.

Either is possible. While most readers can enjoy the ambiguity found in the original sentence, generally readers want to know what the writer means. An unintentionally ambiguous sentence irritates. Unintentional ambiguities are one sign of a careless writer.


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The general rule for adding modifiers (describing words such as adjectives and adverbs) is this: you want the modifier to be as close as possible to the word or phrase that it modifies. That is the case in "fast Corvette."

Be sure, though, that you are clear about which word is being modified. Otherwise you might end up with a sentence like this:

Walking slowly through the park, the plan suddenly came to me.


Oops! The plan was walking slowly through the park? A writer who writes this carelessly probably also thinks carelessly.

How would you correct this sentence?

Original Version:

Walking slowly through the park, the plan suddenly came to me.


Your Improved Version:

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The sentence can be clarified in several ways.

Walking slowly through the park, I suddenly came up with a plan.

or

As I walked slowly through the park, a plan suddenly came to me.


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Together with your partners, rewrite the following sentences, removing any ambiguity that you find. Try to come up with two different versions. Begin writing at the angle brackets.

1. After eating the popcorn, the movie made me sick.

  
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2. At the age of ten, my father died.

   
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3. I bought the book from my friend with a torn cover.

  
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4. Sitting in the locker room, the decision was made to quit the team.

  
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Some Possible Revisions

Compare your versions to these. If yours are different, copy your favorite one below the one here and decide which of the two you like best.

1. After I ate the popcorn, the movie made me sick.



2. When I was ten, my father died.

  

3. I bought the book with a torn cover from my friend.

 

4. Sitting in the locker room, I reached the decision to quit the team.


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Edit the following sentences in the same way.

5. Having broken my leg, the coach made me the manager.


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6. Mother gave the leftovers to the dog we didn't want to eat.

  
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7. While doing my homework, my dad called from the airport.


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8. Completely disoriented, I took the woman to the police.

 
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9. Purring loudly, I scratched my cat's ears.

  
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Some Possible Revisions:


5. After I broke my leg, the coach made me the manager.



6. Mother gave the leftovers we didn't want to eat to the dog.



7. While I was doing my homework, my dad called from the airport.



8. Because she was completely disoriented, I took the woman to the police.



9. My cat purred loudly when I scratched her ears.




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Quiz Your Partners!

Within your writing group, take turns making up sentences with dangling modifiers. Then see if the other partners can remove the ambiguities by editing the sentences.


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If you haven't done so already, name and save this file now. (Press ctrl+S, type a name for the file, and press enter.)

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end of activity
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